A letter to my baby

Dear Lincoln,
I know I should have wrote this letter earlier, like on your first birthday. But, I just postponed, but now I'm writing at the perfect time. Pre- summer vacations and Post-Fiesta.

L, I try to remember to thank God everyday for blessing me with you. This last year had been filled with plenty of challenges, and only after the 6th month did I feel like I could breathe a bit.

L, I do remember when you were born, but I can't quite pin point or remember you being 7.7 lbs tiny or how it felt to hold you in my arms for the first time. And, I've learned that I'm not alone. Other mothers just can't remember either. But, I am very grateful that I wrote little details in my blog of my feelings and emotions in your early days and weeks. And, lord knows I have plenty of pictures.
I do remember that at about 11 days, you feel asleep in my arms through me dancing with you to blaring Zumba music. And, that I used to be able to carry you in one arm.

I remember small segments about the day you were born, like you were very soft and cuddly, like you latched on quickly, and that you had hair!  I remember the first time I held you that your Grandma was by my side because she was scared I was gonna drop you. But, honestly it felt like the most natural thing ever. It was so easy to hold you!

I remember being scared to change your diaper because you would scream. Little did I know that as you grew older you would not only scream, but you would turn, throw your hands up and down, and kick! I will now cherish the "screams only" era of diaper changes when the next one comes along.

L, I now come back to this letter on June 22, 2013, over two months after I started it. But, today I will finish it. Well, at least this letter.

I feel like a horrible mother, because I feel like I missed so many things that you have done. For example, I was trying to remember when we gave you your first "table" food. I know that we gave you your rice cereal at 3 months and 3 weeks, and that by 6 months you were eating three meals a day of baby food servings. But, I can't remember when we started to feed you bean and cheese tacos, etc. But, now, you eat pretty much everything. You are a big fan of beef tacos from Oblate Café, you enjoy pizza, macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes. And, most of all Sweet Potatoes (made by Grandma).

We did find out a few months back that you are allergic to eggs. We were at Jim's eating Pancakes and Eggs, and you broke out in a rash almost immediately after the eggs. We also found out that you are allergic to dogs, but only when they make direct contact with you through licking.

You also are already a frequent summer flyer. Already this summer you flew to San Antonio to Orlando- Ft. Lauderdale to Atlanta to San Antonio (5-2013) and San Antonio to Ft. Wayne and Back.

The trip to Orlando/ Ft. Lauderdale was a blast, you loved the beach, the resort style pool, and of course, we already know you love staying at hotels. You stayed at a fancy resort in Orlando, because Mommy was attending her work conference. And, you stayed at the W-Hotel in Ft. Lauderdale, because hotels.com had to give mommy a deal because the other place we were going to stay at was under construction. You also got to pet a real life alligator, and rode on your very first boat, The Jungle Queen. It was basically a tourist ride through the Ft. Lauderdale canals where we got to see all the richy rich house.

You had a blast in Ft. Wayne Indiana (6-2013) with all your cousins and you were able to spend time with Grandma Carol and Grandpa Mark and Aunt Jane- and all your cousins. We also got to meet the newest Herrberg cousin, Louise.

L, I wish I could write more about every little detail of your life, but I've found that its just not possible. I hope that you will treasure this letter and my "journaling" when your older, because I am trying to hard to keep track of things. I love you more and more each day, your smile, your talking, your shouting, your climbing and all of your facial expressions. I especially love that people see, "You look all like your daddy, but your personality is exactly like your mommys!" 

And, at this very moment, Dad is in your bedroom, trying to rock you to sleep. You nursed with Momma for over two hours straight so I needed a break!!!

But, I still love you! I can't help but still stare down at your little adorable self while you nurse. I know these days will not last much longer. I love you with all my heart and soul.

Love you, Momma