My Allergic Kindergartner

My name is Cathy and my kindergartner is allergic to milk, wheat, gluten, chocolate, bread, eggs, cats, dogs and tree nuts. He also has tested positive for all the items listed on the South Texas Seasonal Allergy panel.

Oh- and, he has severe eczema.

Do you want to know how we found out? Well, I’ll tell ya.

First, let me preface by saying that being his mom is pretty darn awesome. But, there are times that I have felt like the worst mom ever!

Like the time my kindergartener was 4 years old. We recently found out that gluten was causing his intense eczema and removed it from his diet. Picture this: A very typical birthday party with pizza, cake, cupcakes, and a piñata filled with candy. (Well, of course a piñata一it’s a party!) Unfortunately for our kindergartner, he cannot eat any of this food. And, while there are many parents who are strict with their children’s diet and give them “cheat days” as we do with our non-allergic 3-year old, fortunately (or unfortunately), this kindergartner does not have that choice.

Now for the Worst Mom Ever Award: I forgot to pack his pizza and cookie. You know―the dairy-free, gluten-free, egg-free pizza and cookie that dad worked hard in the kitchen to make? Yes, THIS mom left it at the house on the counter.

At the party, this mom is in the “food room” helping her then 2-year old gobble his pizza quickly while dad took the hard part of being in the back room, calming his son and helping him realize that mom made a mistake. To this day, I still remember his yell and that sad face when he realized I had forgotten his food. Worst Mom Ever Award, indeed.

This scenario is very typical for us, minus the part where mom forgets the food. We are now professionals at packing his special food, snack, and even his eczema cream depending on the type of event we will attend. So, every birthday party, wedding, festival, play date, special snack or food day at school, field trip, movie theatre trip, zoo day, the list goes on... We have it covered: Lunch box for the win!

But the truth is, even when we DON’T forget his food, it is still really difficult to watch him. Whenever people offer him food, now he knows and politely says, “No, thank you.” And, if/when they insist, he says, “I am allergic.”

In the summer of 2017, I took him to get his blood drawn. We picked some very specific panels that could not be found in some of the skin prick panels. My kindergartener was the tough one. He asked the nurse how many needles and how long it would take and she answered him. He bravely said, “Okay” and looked up at me with his slightly puffy eyes and said, “Mom, it’s OKAY. I will be okay.” I still remember how tiny his arm looked and me staring at his little body that barely took up ¼ of the chair he was sitting in. He squeezed my hand as the blood was taken. It was a total of about 4 and a half minutes but felt like an eternity. I cried inside but kept my strong face for him.

I cannot count the number of times people have asked, “What is wrong with him? Why is he all scratched up, banged up, beat up, red, bruised…?” You name it, we’ve heard it. Oh and the “You-need-to-see-a-different-doctor” replies. The list goes on. But we’ve learned to stay strong; nod, listen, and keep a straight face. (see before photos below)

His 5th Birthday w/ Bestie Noah

At his school happy with dad! 

Selfie with mom! 

 

The bottom line is, you have to listen to your heart. And I cannot thank God more for a better partner in life to face these struggles with than my husband who has become even more of our master chef these last 2 years.

You see, the kindergartner attends Montessori School and they have a Cultural Luncheon a few times a year where they celebrate different cultures. At the end of every cultural study, they have a catered lunch of that country’s food. So, the husband has mastered the traditional Irish Stew with soda bread, Peruvian Arroz Chaufa,  Brazilian food, Jamaican food, and more. And they’re all free and clear so the kindergartner can eat as much as he wants. Oh, and let’s not forget the “Muffins with Mom” and “Donuts with Dad” days of the year. The husbands specialty donuts and muffins beat Shipley’s any day! They are always fresh and melt in your mouth each time!!!

Flashback to two weeks into my now kindergartner’s 2nd year of “real” school: He is 4 years old and the year is 2015. We get a call from the school nurse that went something like, “His face, legs and basically entire body are very itchy and inflamed. He is scratching so hard that the back of his knees are now covered in blood.” To relieve his pain, she applied ice and bandages and sent him back to the classroom. Three days later, as I pick him up, he is limping towards me and has two large pieces of white gauze wrapped around his little legs. He tells me, “Mommy, it only hurts a little but I am trying not to itch!”

He suffered from eczema on and off from about 4 months old until about 2 years old. But, at 4 years old, it came back in full force and NEVER went.

There’s more to the story….

After the bandage incident, I checked him out of school the next day and took him to the allergist. At this point, his entire body is inflamed, he has bandages on his legs and over the tops of his hands. His face is scabbing and is basically covered in redness and scars. I suggest to the allergist (of course after doing my own research) that maybe it is something he is eating combined with seasonal allergies. Allergist says, “No, if what he is eating has never affected him before, then that is not what it is now. Here are some steroids and antibiotics to help him not get staph. He can take the meds and it will be gone. This type of thing happens from time to time with children his age.”

Immediately, I feel my insides drop and want to hit the allergist over his head with my purse. But I digress. I take in what he says, take the meds and get on my way to get a second opinion. The kindergartner takes the meds, clears for maybe a two week time frame and it’s back!!!

We ended up taking him to a nutritionist/naturopath, someone who is NOT A DOCTOR. My older brother is the all-organic hipster type; free of this, free of that, and he had been under this person’s care for a while. In about a year, he lost 60 lbs., changed his eating habits and was much healthier. So, I took his recommendation out of desperation.

The recommendation was life changing. The naturopath did “muscle testing” on Lincoln and all sorts of other tests. We found out that he was extremely sensitive to wheat and heavy metals, so we needed to remove those items from his diet immediately. He also recommended a cabinet full of supplements, we bought those but that was not the route we stayed with.

We continued to stick with food elimination. His first initial spout of bleeding, itching and redness cleared within a month of removing gluten. Then, at a Cultural Luncheon, he ate a piece of bread by accident―a tiny piece―and that started the itching again.

We also finally found a dermatologist (thank God for my sister in law, Chels leading us to her) within that time frame and she gave him some blends of meds to help alleviate the infection. She also did a biopsy―yes, we allowed a doctor to poke two holes into our son’s tiny leg in order to try and solve what was wrong with him. Ugh. But $700 later, the biopsy results showed he tested negative for Celiac Disease and they confirmed that he has severe eczema.

In March of 2018, he had another severe breakout and we went off the suggestion of a friend to take a “pinnertest” which tests for sensitivities. We found that Lincoln was sensitive to dairy, so we officially removed that from his diet as well. In April of 2018, his skin started showing clear signs.

We are now in June of 2018 and he is still clear. I mean, we have minor itching and very minor redness but we can say he is clear! We will not add any of his triggers back into his diet anytime soon, and we will continue to pray that his skin continues to heal! We ask that you pray WITH us.

See now pics below!

Enjoying Fiesta with brother and bestie, Macy!

While he is the allergic kindergartner at birthday parties and at school, it is not a feat to him or any of his friends or family members. Some of his classmates know his exact allergies and rally with him while they are shopping with their own parents…

“Mom, maybe we shouldn’t get that because Lincoln can’t eat that and I don’t want to get him sick.”

- Macy Jayne

“Mom, Lincoln won’t be able to eat that ice cream at my birthday party. You should get him his own.”

-Alessandra

And the cute comments that I hear from parents regarding him keep coming. I just pray to God that he continues to heal and we continue to stay strong with him! I mean, come on, think back―what did you used to eat when you were in kindergarten?  

His Kinder Graduation!!! 

I can tell story after story about the struggle it has taken us as parents to get to where we are… and after all this time, I’d still say that the struggle was worth it. We made choices for our child. Choices that some doctors, family members, friends and probably so many around us did not believe in. But, you have to know that only YOU know your child, and that journey is yours to take with them. So, do not ever let anyone take that journey away from you.