I just want to feel normal again

Long time no post, so much to write about, but instead I want to focus on feeling normal again.

I've been sick with "who knows what" since 12/24- Christmas Eve. I've had fever of as high as 102, probably higher, but I was too weak to take my temperature in the middle of the night when I know it was at it's peak, and I also misplaced my (2) thermometers plus Lincoln's (2) so I can no longer measure my temp. Thermometer as birthday present, (anyone)?

I've had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad cough that has caused me extreme pain in my upper back and under my arms. I've been sore in this area since 12/30.  Tanya, my chiropractor bestie said its probably a rib out. Seriously, I've ran 8 half marathons and a full marathon, plus done several intense exercise routines in my lifetime and I've never been sore for this long! Crazy. Every time I cough, I feel like my bones are going to fall out. And, when I sneeze or laugh out loud, its worse! Not to mention each time I carry my Lincoln, it takes every bone in my body and all the strength in my legs to lift my 28 pound baby boy. Which saddens me, because I want to be strong again, I'm his mother for crying out loud!

We traveled to the lovely Ft. Wayne, Indiana to visit our Indiana family- 12/25 - 12/30. Talk about the worst travel experience I have ever had in my life. (Even worse than when I flew 8 "ish" hours from London to Houston with an ear infection that was so bad, the doctor said I was very close to blowing an ear drum out). Chris Herrberg, my guardian angel, my strength, my world helped me through these horrible travel times. He had to roll two pieces of carry on luggage, plus the stroller with mountains of bags on top all on his own! Plus, he has to sit through the security checks on Lincoln's milk, snacks, etc. However, I, on the other hand chased an almost two year old through security into and out of the gift shop and down the about 200 yards through the terminal to our gate without shoes and with my pants falling off! Luckily when we arrived at the gate it was family boarding, so we were able to go right in and the chasing ended! And, the nice gate agent told Chris she would check our carry on bags at no charge! Merry Christmas to us!

Our total travel time was around 6 hours, included a plane change in Atlanta, and then on to Ft. Wayne. The less than three hour flight to Atlanta was horrid, I felt like I was sitting in a freezer the entire time and could not move! The Ft. Wayne flight got better, but I wanted to sleep and I couldn't because my nose felt so dry on the inside that I was not able to breathe.

Needless to say, we arrived in Ft. Wayne safely. At the airport, we were greeted by Aunt Jodi, & Cousins Chaise and Cameron Kahlenbeck. Cousin Chaise was holding a lovely sign lit up with Christmas lights that read "Herrberg". I wanted to take a photo, but I could barely see straight, hence no strength to reach for my camera.

We arrived at Casa Herrberg and were greeted by smiling faces which always feels great to see loved ones you have not seen in so long. And, the glow on my husbands face each time he sees his family is truly priceless! 

All I had the strength to do upon arrival at the Herrberg's was sit in Papa Mark's recliner, speak sparingly, and smile when I could. According to Uncle Chad, "I looked like hell." However, I appreciated his honesty, because that is exactly how I felt. I felt like I was going to be sick to my stomach every time I moved and my cough and runny nose was taking the life from me. I didn't even have the strength to walk down to the basement to see my little Joy open his Christmas presents with his Indiana family. Heartbreaking, again! But, I thank God for my loving Indiana family, they watched Lincoln while Chris wrapped several presents that we had shipped from Texas. Thank goodness I had labeled all the gift bags and had somewhat of a list of who received what gift. I just could not move, none the less wrap gifts. And, the family also helped Chris chase Lincoln SEVERAL times up and down "those basement stairs".   I did however stir up the strength to make it downstairs at the tail end of opening gifts, so I was able to see Lincoln interact with his Indiana cousins. Priceless, indeed. Its so crazy how fast children grow and how happy being around family makes Lincoln. He is just like his parents, family is everything to him!

The sickness continued while I was in Ft. Wayne. Well one day, I felt well enough to take a shower put on make up and actually blow dry my hair and it was my first fever free day! Then, relapse... intense chills, major stomach aches and the cough from hell came back.  Even though I was sick, I still enjoyed the trip, watching my babies be as happy as can be was very uplifting. Even though I was not able to participate in the family winery outing and witness Lincoln's first time playing in the snow, I was content knowing that my babies were having a blast. And, I'm grateful for all the photos. (Thanks Chelsea Herrberg)!

And, thank you Herrberg Family from the bottom of my heart. I'm sorry I wasn't myself this Christmas, but I thank you for making me feel welcome even though I looked and probably acted like crud.  Thank you Jodi for serving me Christmas dinner in the recliner and even bringing me seconds. Thank you Craig and Chelsea for running a marathon with Lincoln throughout the entire Herrberg household. Thank you Aunt Jane and Uncle Delbert for staying upstairs with me during dinner so I didn't feel alone. And, thank you everyone for being the best family a girl could ask for!

So, its now January 5th and yesterday I had the sickness close to its worth. I threw my entire breakfast in the shower and could barely move afterwards!  I looked like a ghost according to my family. We drove to my parents house so Chris could compete in a horseshoe tournament, I didn't want my boys to feel couped up in the house because Mommy was sick. I was able to soak up the sunny 70 degree weather for about 12 minutes before I had to run inside to rest. I was scared to move in any sort of way in fear that I would be sick to my stomach. So I was walking stiff and sitting stiff for the entire day. So, yes that was me, the pale, mummy trying her best to make it through the evening on an empty stomach.

So, I write this blog because I am telling myself, if I write, it will help me feel normal again. But, the main reason I write this blog is to send a message to Moms and Dads with toddler aged children who feel normal right now: don't take it for granted.  Pick up your babies and fly them in the air. Take them outside (weather permitting) and kick the ball around the yard or chase them. Or, if you must stay in doors, take some time to read them books, throw the ball around with them, just do something (anything) active with them. Do this, for the parents like me that just don't feel normal right now, I will thank you for it... and so will your children! Trust me, what I've learned through this is that my strength is everything to me, because without out, I am simply not normal.

Thanks for listening.

P.S. My other guardian angel through this sickness has been my caldo, hot tea, lemonade making MOTHER! Simply cannot to say enough to thank her for everything she does for me each and every day!